Journaling Part 1

Developing a chronic illness and then receiving a diagnosis along with the information that there is no cure. You will be stuck with this as long as you live, or at least for a very, very long time is traumatizing. Invasive medical tests and procedures are traumatizing. Stigma, loss of identity and self-esteem, and a myriad of unpleasant emotions are all companions of chronic illness. You may be inhibiting the expression of this trauma because you are afraid of acknowledging it or because you are afraid that you will alienate people who have to listen to you. In Opening Up: The Healing Power of Confiding in Others, James W. Pennebaker states that, “actively holding back or inhibiting our thoughts and feelings can be hard work. Over time, the work of inhibition gradually undermines the body’s defenses. Like other stressors, inhibition can affect immune function, the action of the heart and vascular system, and even the biochemical workings of the brain and nervous systems. In short, excessive holding back of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors can place people at risk for both major and minor diseases.” You certainly don’t need another disease and you don’t want to make the one you have worse. But you don’t want to drive people crazy as you tell and retell ‘your story.’ You may think that no one wants to be around a sick person. But as you just read, one way or another, the story and the feelings that accompany it have to be expressed. What can you do? You can journal. It’s just as effective as telling, and maybe even more so.

Your journal can be written or you can speak it into a tape recorder. Either way, expressing what is on your mind can help you clarify your thinking and have a profound influence on the way you see yourself and the impact of the disease on your life. When you talk, or write, about the trauma of chronic illness you stop the stress of inhibition and gain insights into yourself.